What Anxiety Really Feels Like (and Why You’re Not “Overreacting”)
If you live with anxiety, you’ve probably heard some version of:
“Try not to worry.”
“You’re overthinking.”
“Just relax.”
And if you’re honest… those words don’t help.
They often make you feel worse.
Because anxiety doesn’t feel small when you’re inside it.
It feels real. Overwhelming. Exhausting. Sometimes even frightening.
This blog is here to help you feel understood, and to remind you that you’re not overreacting. Your nervous system is trying to protect you.
Anxiety isn’t “just worry”
People often imagine anxiety as nervousness before a big event.
But for many people, anxiety is a full-body experience that can show up at any time.
It can look like:
A constant feeling that something bad might happen
Your mind racing even when you want to rest
Feeling on edge for no clear reason
Struggling to switch off or relax
Overthinking conversations, decisions, or future plans
Feeling overwhelmed by everyday tasks
Avoiding situations because they feel too much
Anxiety isn’t a choice.
It’s your nervous system trying to keep you safe.
What anxiety actually feels like inside
Many people say the hardest part of anxiety is that it’s invisible.
On the outside, you might look like you’re coping.
On the inside, it can feel very different.
In your thoughts
Anxiety often sounds like:
What if something goes wrong?
What if I mess this up?
What if people judge me?
What if I can’t cope?
Your brain is constantly scanning for danger, even when nothing obvious is wrong.
This is exhausting.
In your body
Anxiety isn’t only in your head. It lives in your body too.
You might notice:
A tight chest or shallow breathing
A racing heart
Feeling restless or unable to sit still
Stomach aches or nausea
Muscle tension or headaches
Feeling shaky or light-headed
Trouble sleeping
Your body is in fight-or-flight mode, even when you’re sitting on the sofa.
No wonder you feel tired.
In your emotions
Living with anxiety can bring:
Irritability
Tearfulness
Feeling overwhelmed
Feeling “on edge”
Feeling like you can’t switch off
Feeling guilty for struggling
Many people tell me they feel frustrated with themselves for feeling this way.
They ask: “Why can’t I just cope like everyone else?”
Why you’re not overreacting
Anxiety is not weakness.
It’s not attention-seeking.
It’s not a personal failure.
It’s your nervous system doing its job a little too well.
Your brain is designed to keep you safe.
When it senses threat, whether physical or emotional, it activates a survival response.
This can be triggered by:
Stress or burnout
Big life changes
Work or school pressure
Relationship difficulties
Past experiences
Growing up in environments where you had to stay alert
Long periods of feeling overwhelmed
Sometimes anxiety shows up after years of “holding everything together.”
So if you’ve been telling yourself you should just cope, this is your gentle reminder:
You don’t need to minimise your experience to deserve support.
The hidden exhaustion of anxiety
Many people with anxiety are high-functioning.
You might:
Go to work or school
Care for others
Keep up appearances
Seem calm to the outside world
But inside, you’re constantly managing your thoughts and emotions.
That takes huge emotional energy.
Living with anxiety can feel like:
Running a marathon in your head every day
Carrying invisible pressure
Being permanently switched “on”
It makes sense that you feel tired.
“Why can’t I just fix this myself?”
This is something I hear often.
You may have tried:
Breathing exercises
Mindfulness apps
Self-help books
Telling yourself to be positive
Pushing through and hoping it passes
These tools can be helpful, but anxiety often runs deeper than quick fixes.
Because anxiety is usually connected to:
How safe you feel in the world
How you learned to cope growing up
The pressure you carry
The expectations you place on yourself
Therapy gives you space to gently explore this, at your own pace.
How counselling can help
In therapy, we don’t try to “get rid of” anxiety overnight.
Instead, we work together to help you:
Understand your anxiety rather than fight it
Feel safer in your own thoughts and body
Reduce the constant sense of pressure
Build confidence in handling difficult feelings
Learn to switch off without guilt
Feel more in control of your life again
Most importantly, you don’t have to carry it alone anymore.
Many people say the biggest relief is simply having a space where they don’t have to pretend they’re fine.
You don’t have to wait until it gets worse
A lot of people reach out for therapy when anxiety becomes overwhelming.
But you don’t need to wait until you’re at breaking point.
You can seek support simply because things feel hard right now.
You deserve support before burnout.
Before panic attacks.
Before exhaustion takes over.
A gentle invitation
If this blog resonated with you, you don’t have to keep managing anxiety on your own.
I offer a warm, supportive space where you can talk openly and feel truly heard. Together, we can explore what’s behind your anxiety and find ways to help life feel calmer and more manageable.
If you’re thinking about starting therapy, you’re very welcome to get in touch for an informal enquiry.
You don’t have to have everything figured out.
You just need a place to start.